Taking on Someone Else's Burdens

     Friendship with other believers is a wonderful thing.  It can provide us with encouragement, stimulation, accountability and challenge us to think.   When Christ is at the center of any relationship whether friend or family,  we find rich blessings.  However, because we still have the sin nature in our flesh, we have to continually guard ourselves against taking on someone else's burdens or hurts.  Satan knows our weaknesses and can do great damage in this area if we are not careful.
     I remember very well my mother warning me not to get caught in the middle of someone's dispute with another.  She said it would not turn out well for me if I did.  I must confess that this has happened to me on a few occasions, and she was right.  I ended up embroiled in a controversy that had nothing to do with me in the end, but it spoiled my outlook on everything.
     Even our Lord had people come to Him with a request to get involved  in their dispute.  We read in Luke 12:13-14 about a brother who asked Jesus to help him:  "“And someone in the crowd said to Him, ‘Teacher, tell my brother to divide the family inheritance with me.’  But He (Jesus) said to him, ‘Man, who appointed me a judge or arbiter over you?'”  In other words,  Jesus refused to get entangled in another person's disagreement.  Did this mean He did not care?  Not at all.  Jesus was using wisdom.  There is a time to help a friend, and certainly, we are to be ambassadors of reconciliation.  However, we are not to become embroiled in conflict because we ultimately end up getting hurt ourselves.  So what should we do when a friend comes to us to unload their burden of wounds?
     First and foremost, we should listen to them, and if possible, encourage them.  Everyone needs a sounding board.  We all need acceptance and a chance to be real with others.  However, we also have to be careful not to pick up that friend's offense as though it were our own.  Recognize that God may be at work in that person and we do not want to hinder God's efforts to mature them.  In the flesh, we want to fix everything and everybody.  Sometimes, we cannot do either. Yet there is something we can and should do.
     We should take time to pray with that person and continue to lift them up in prayer each day. God is capable of healing the offense our friend feels.  He is able to do what we cannot.  Jesus said in Matthew 5:9:  "Blessed are the peacemakers:  for they shall be called the children of God."  This is what we need to be doing on a daily basis.  We are to be peacemakers.  The last thing we want to be is a troublemaker in the household of God.
     Jesus is the only burden bearer whose blood was shed to cover our sins.  Therefore we know He is trustworthy to bring about a resolution to the dispute or offense our friend is feeling.  If we choose to take their offense into our own hearts and make it our own, there are some sad consequences we will face.  We become embittered towards the party that hurt our friend.  This keeps us from being a peacemaker or reconciler that Christ has called us to be.  We begin to look with a critical eye at everything the offending party does.  I have seen this happen in the workplace where one employee poisons another co-worker's outlook towards the boss or a fellow employee.  Going to work is no longer enjoyable.  We find ourselves looking at the other party all the time and building a case against them.  All of this drama only contributes to a negative atmosphere to work in and does little to bring people together.  Christ has called us to live as lights in this world and not as agents of darkness.  Therefore, like Jesus, let us be wise and not become embroiled in a dispute.  Instead, pray for all involved that God would heal hearts remembering that Christ was wounded for us and our transgressions.  He alone is the burden bearer.  This will bring glory to the Father and peace to those involved.
Selah!
   

Standing on Solid Ground

     Watching old movies is fun and brings back many memories.  One of the recurring scenes I remember the most from movies I watched while growing up was the danger of the quicksand pit.  The hero would be running away from the bad guys when he falls into a quicksand pool.  Slowly, as he struggles, he sinks deeper and deeper.  This heightened the suspense.  Would he make it out okay? Just when everything looked hopeless, the hero's horse or buddy would come along and save the day pulling him to safety.  They say that art imitates life, and with that in mind, I do believe that many of the philosophies that abound today are like quicksand pits.  Look, with me, at the interaction between Jesus and a Scribe.
     On one occasion, during the course of the Lord's ministry, He was asked by a Scribe what the most important commandment was.  "Jesus answered, 'The most important is, 'Hear, O Israel:  The Lord our God, the Lord is one.  And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your

soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.  The second is this:  'You shall love your neighbor as yourself.  There is no other commandment greater than these'" (Mark 12:29-31).
     Jesus began His answer with the Shema (statement of faith)  which affirmed His very solid standing on God's Word.  Always the Pharisees were out to trick Him in making a statement that would prove him to be unorthodox in His thinking and contrary to the Word of God.  The faithful Jew recited the Shema both morning and night.  However, Jesus added something to this rendition of the statement of faith.  Deuteronomy 6:5 tells us to love God with all our heart, soul and strength, but Jesus added mind.  This is a crucial addition as we must love the Lord with every part of us...not just a portion.  Then Jesus goes on to follow up with loving our neighbor as ourself.  The love we have for God flows naturally into love of our fellow man.  In this reply, our Lord is summing up the intent of The Ten Commandments given by God.  The first four commands deal with our relationship with God and the remaining six deal with our relationship with man.
     At every turn, Jesus dodged the quicksand that the Pharisees hoped to sink Him in with His wise answers.  Also, our Savior was affirming the Bible as God's Word for us which offers life and hope.  It is the solid foundation on which to build a life.  When God is first in our heart, soul, mind and strength, we can develop the right sort of friendships and relationships in this world built on the genuine love of God.
     In addition with our focus on God, we can face the trials that inevitably come into every life.  He enables us to walk through the storms.  While doubts and struggles do not disappear for us, the effect they have upon us is diminished by our faith in God.  Love is a powerful weapon against the quicksand philosophies of this world like relativism, pragmatism, atheism and any other "ism's" a person will confront.
     Even more, Jesus affirmed the Word of God as the only rule for faith and authority.  As He later said, ""Do not think that I have come to abolish the Law or the Prophets; I have not come to abolish them but to fulfill them" (Matt. 5:17).  He was the Word made flesh who dwelt among us to show us the truth.  Furthermore, Jesus went on to tell us:  "For truly, I say to you, until heaven and earth pass away, not an iota, not a dot, will pass from the Law until all is accomplished" (Matt. 5:18).  This is the solid ground that will keep us from sinking.
     I cannot imagine anyone wanting to walk into a quicksand pit unless they have a death wish.  However, there are many hidden ones waiting for us to make a misstep.  This is why it is critical for us to be students of the Bible both Old and New Testaments.  God's Word is whole, living and filled with truth.  Reading it prepares us each day to face the world in which we live.  May God give us the mind, heart, soul and strength to love Him and our fellow man as much as we love ourselves.  If we do this, we will fulfill God's Law and bring Him the glory.  Selah!

Do You Want to Grow Up?

     When I was a child, I hated conflicts, confrontations, arguments or anything that seemed disagreeable.  My solution was to run and hide.  However, if I was the one who had brought about the conflict, my parents would inevitably find me and my day of reckoning would come.
     Later, in college, I still found myself wanting to avoid any unpleasant situations.  Once again, my solution was to avoid it or run from it rather than face it.  As my husband would say, this avoidance of facing reality started in the Garden.  Indeed, it did.  Neither Adam nor Eve wanted to face God

after their act of disobedience.  However, whether it is an act of disobedience that we are trying to escape responsibility for or just a very difficult crisis in our lives, God does not want us to run away from it.
     Once again, an interesting discussion came up in our work place the other day as we were talking about a person whose spouse had Alzheimer's.  The consensus seemed to be that this is a horrible disease and no one wants to go through it and be a burden to anyone.  Naturally, no one wants to be afflicted by this disease, but as I pointed out, the person who has it is blissfully unaware of the affect it has on others.  I know.  My mother suffered from this for ten years and I looked after her.  When I mentioned this and how I managed to get through this difficult time, the response was, "Yes, but you cannot tell me it wasn't terribly painful and you wished that you could have avoided this."  Certainly, I had many struggles emotionally while watching my mother slowly move into a fog from which there was no return, but I also learned better how to love her.  God used this in my life to help grow me in His grace.  Was it easy?  No!
     As our discussion continued, I said, "Aren't we running away from God's purposes to grow us up when we say we do not or will not go through a hard place?"  Once again, it may be that in God's providence for our lives we must face some painful things that we might become conformed more to Christ.  Those ten years with an ailing mother were hard because I had four small children whom I was homeschooling at the time.  Yet, when my mother left this life, I knew I had done all I could to help her.  I had peace and a much greater love for her than ever before.  This is what Peter spoke of in his letter:  "And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who has called you to His eternal glory in Christ, will Himself restore, confirm, strengthen and establish you" (I Peter 5:10).  This is what God did for me.
     Jesus made it clear that in this world we would have sorrows, troubles and difficulties.  He said:  "I have said these things to you, that in Me you may have peace.  In the world you will have tribulation.  But take heart;  I have overcome the world" (John 16:33).  Lets face it.  Would we ever grow up into a deeper walk with God if we never faced problems?  Being a Christian doesn't mean that some how all of life will be easy.  However, we serve a God who will walk with us through the hard places.  He will give us peace and all that we need to find our way through it.
     If we choose to run away from difficulties, we are prolonging the process of growing in Christ.  Instead of hiding from situations, we need to run to the arms of our heavenly Father.  We need to ask Him what He wants us to learn from this situation.  Painful as life may be, we cannot avoid disease, death, heartache.  It comes to both the just and unjust alike.  The difference the world wants to see in a Christian is how you will, with God's help, walk through the trial.
     Job, after losing his family, his wealth, his health and even the support of his wife said:  "Though He slay me, yet will I trust Him...." (Job 13:15a).  He certainly did not understand the test and trials he was undergoing, but in the end, God restored to Him a family and strengthened his faith in the sovereignty of God over every aspect of his life.  May we have that trust, that faith in God to yield to His purposes for our life without whining, complaining, or running away.  For those who stay the course, James has this to say:  "Blessed is the man who remains steadfast under trial, for when he has stood the test he will receive the crown of life which God has promised to those who love Him" (James 1:12).  Selah!